i sit now at the gering publich library while my father works, a man searches childrens books, sophie goes to a doctor appointment, my mother possibly sits and ponders, others make coffee, lattes and cappuccinos, dear ones sleep on the other side of the world, sam enjoys his time with beth, kathy rests, and others go on with their days possibly not realizing the affect they have, the power that is at work within them, the underlying yet louder than life hope, that cries inside to be allowed a say.
i spent last wednesday learning more of what is inside of me.
i made my way to buzzards roost, stared off into the distance, searching a point to which i would wander.
maybe a week ago, a man came into starbucks, and through small talk, comments and unthoughtful deep statements, i mentioned to him... its about the journey somewhere, not about getting to the place, because we are never just there, but starting on yet another journey.
-enjoy the journey, because you will always be on one.
the trek i made was not about just getting to the place far off in the distance, the place that may have seen many a cold nights without foot travel, but about making the path to get there.
from climbing down buzzards roost, to trekking across the forest floor, pacing down steep hillsides, crossing a mostly frozen creek to finally huffing and puffing up the steepest incline, stopping multiple times to breath... reaching the top, laying in the snow... knowing... the journey i am now on, builds me for those that are ahead. it creates deep in me an understanding of something deeper, that one day i may share with those who will carry on after me.
it strengthens me for the battle.
it teaches me how to carry my sword.
and it awakes me heart to a deeper cause.
how intense is it that each experience we endure is a parallel to the unseen.
there are some moments when it just hits you. your mind is on something about something, your thoughts running full speed...
and then,
unexpectedly,
everything stops.
you step out of where you just were..
your eyes are open to the brightness of the sun.
your hands are bitten by the crisp wind.
...and His way is revealed.
i cant describe exactly how this is...
it is like climbing over a hill thinking.. was that it. was that all there was?
then, peeking over the crest you see a peak... followed by endless more.
its a beach, and every grain is a snow covered peak that reaches further in the sky than the last...
a vast array!
who told us to stop dreaming...
who told us that we need to settle....
who told us not knowing is bad....
who was it that lied to us...
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